Of course, because I eat salad at least once a week. I'm starting to wonder if my children pay attention to me at all. I mean, I'm sure they do... like occasionally they'll notice if I get my hair cut or if I'm gone for a week or something... but is this really what my kids think of me?
This comes up because T.J., my 7 year old, made one of those books that they make moms for Mother's Day. It's actually really great, but has some very interesting (and little known) facts about me and my relationship with my son in it. For example: "My mom likes to play tennis." Funny. We played once at the park 2 weekends ago and we left after about 15 minutes because the boys couldn't keep the ball even close to our court. So I told them that we'd come back to the park when they can hit the box that I've made on the garage door with their ball 10x in a row. Another example: "My mom is funny when she does a handstand." Huh. I didn't know that I've been doing handstands in front of him (or anywhere, for that matter), but I guess I should do more, because it's amusing. Then there's the whole salad thing. The picture that accompanies this statement is amusing as well, because T.J. (you know it's him because he's chosen to label who is who in the picture, just for clarification) is up near the fridge (with a fork), and I'm sitting at the table with my salad, which looks like enough salad to feed my family its salad quota for the month.
Another example, but this one finally proves that my son does listen to me from time to time: "My mom does not like to yell." Notice this does not say that my mom does not yell, because that would just be a lie. Instead, he's chosen to highlight my statement that I always seem to be saying AFTER the yelling has commenced... "Do you think I LIKE to yell? Well I DON'T!" Ah ha. He's paying attention. Then there's the "My mom is afraid of spiders" statement, which is true as well, but what the picture DOESN'T show is that the only other person in the room with me and the spiders (which, by the way, makes our house look like it could double as a dungeon) is my husband, who is carrying a shoe to save the day. My other children are nowhere in the picture, as they, too, scream like girls when they see a spider. So while this statement is true, it's making me look unnecessarily wussy-ish.
Lastly, "My mom always tells me the news online." Because he's so interested, I guess. At least he's not putting down something like "my mom is always on facebook."
At least he did not write, "My mom spends most of her time working," which I am STILL sore about from last year. Those books are super cute. I especially like that I'm afraid of lions. Because, you know, I encounter lions pretty regularly in my daily life.
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